So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm just crazy horny about you
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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