hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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