how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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