People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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