Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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