careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
