It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
