ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
