i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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