Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Randomize
