your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize