Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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