That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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