We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
