He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
