I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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