careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
