what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
