Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
