Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
