Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Randomize
