Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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