Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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