Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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