Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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