so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
