Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
