I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
