Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
