Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize