She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
