Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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