But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
