Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
