Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
