Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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