You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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