the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
