maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
