Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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