She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Randomize
