Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
