There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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