I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
