i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
