if only i could text you this smell
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
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