sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
