PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
