I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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