He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize