i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
